📜💀 Adventure 0 - Gobsmackers: Guild Meetup

📜 The Curator’s Ledger: Volume I - Session 0

Setting: The Yawning Portal Tavern (and this mortal plane)
Campaign Format: 8 Monthly Adventures
Curated by: The Curator (Recruiter of Renegades, Banisher of Boredom)

🍖 Introduction & Vibes

Welcome, Hero. You’ve been hand-picked (or randomly drawn from a tavern brawl) to join a prestigious, totally-legit organization known as The Guild Of Brave Scoundrels, Mercenaries And Criminally Knowledgeable Explorers, Rogues and Specialists (GOBSMACKERS)™. You're not here because you're the best. You're here because you were available, had a cool outfit, and didn't ask too many questions.

🍖 The Meat of the Matter

Let us never forget the true centerpiece of that night: the brisket. Perfectly roasted, endlessly discussed, and the only thing everyone agreed upon. Heroes may squabble, dice may betray, portals may collapse, but brisket is eternal.

🎩 The Curator’s Sales Pitch

The Curator arrived with all the pomp of a half-bored insurance salesman and the menace of a wizard who’s been left on hold for too long. He promised gold, glory, vague trauma, and a dangerously unclear job description. His communication methods?

• Sealed envelopes

• Telepathic sarcasm

• Birds with side-hustles

The recruits, in varying states of sobriety, leaned in. Some nodded. Some frowned. One asked if dental was covered. The Curator responded by sliding over a contract thicker than a dwarven stew.

⚔️ The Heroes Assemble

From soot-stained dwarves to pirates with upside-down maps, from assassins hiding in plain sight to halflings already halfway through the ale keg, the Guild roster was set. None of them looked like heroes. Which is precisely what made them perfect.

Each received:

• A glorious set of miniatures to cherish forever.

• A character card brimming with hope and impending doom

• A deck of shiny powers

• A subtle awareness that their odds of survival were… let’s say “variable”

📈 Renown, Not XP

Session 0 also introduced the Guild’s most sacred of currencies: Renown Points. Unlike XP, RNP came with swagger and the occasional right to rename an NPC something embarrassing. Show up, survive, play nice, or pull off something wild, and you earned points. The ledger was opened, the rules were clear, and the path to glory was… well, brisket-flavored.

Instead of traditional XP, you earn Renown Points (RNP) based on how well you perform in each adventure. Think of it like XP but with more swagger.

Criteria	RNP Gained
Showed Up (physically & mentally)	+1
Completed the mission	+1
Great teamwork or roleplay	+1
DM Bonus: Heroic/Wildcard moment	+1

Level Progression:

Level	Total RNP Needed	Perks Unlocked
1	0	Basic loadout, smug optimism
2	4	+1 HP, New At-Will/Utility
3	8	+1 HP, New Daily/Utility
4	12	+1 HP, Signature Power/Passive

Extra Renown? Use it to buy rerolls, temp magic items, or rename NPCs for chaos.

🗺️ Contracts Ahead

Eight adventures lay before the Guild. Dungeons, castles, jungles, and the occasional dragon with childhood issues. A tapestry of chaos waiting to be painted in neon fireballs, heroic blunders, and the faint smell of goblin laundry.

🎲 The First Deeds

That night was not about slaying dragons. It was about introductions, signing away rights no one read, sparring over spilled ale, and discovering that this Guild was, in fact, doomed and glorious in equal measure.

They shook hands, raised mugs, and pledged to stand together in the face of certain doom. Or at least until dessert.

And thus began the Guild of Highly Unlikely Heroes. Bound not by destiny. Not by divine right. But by brisket.